What comes to mind when you hear the word “Intimidation”?
A very successful person?
In your mind, are these people kind or more self-serving and careless about how they might treat others?
If you’re like most people, then your initial associations with this word could fit any or all of these examples.
Now, clear you mind and think: Can someone be intimidating in a good way?
Someone who is very skilled or intelligent in a field?
Someone who has done so many kind acts that you are in awe of him?
Someone who is a well-loved public figure known for his generosity and goodwill?
See the difference? So what does this mean for you?
Is being intimidating a realistic goal? Not exactly. Instead, you should strive to emulate the qualities and attributes of a “good” intimidating person.
Lifelong Learning and Skill Acquisition
Take the genius. The qualities that make him intimidating are his intellect and his works, both products of his probing mind and innovative thinking.
To gain qualities like these you can focus intensely on a subject. I’ve gone through periods of concentrated studying when new hobbies catch my interest.
I’ve had phases of chess, poker, martial arts, writing, dating, and other pursuits throughout my teenage years up until now.
When I chose to learn a subject, I did thorough research by finding the best teachers, devouring the best books, and learning the best training courses. I can’t tell you how many chess books I read during my chess phase, but let’s just say I was a grade A nerd.
And then my interests faded. I lost interest in chess for years until something sparked the interest again. The bookshelf still had all of my old chess books and I repeated the process. That’s when the remarkable thing happens.
You’ll notice that after taking a break from a subject and resuming your study, your skills may have jumped up significantly from their previous level.
Your brain doesn’t forget what it learns. Not completely anyway.
It may take some brief retraining to recall what you once knew but the skill comes back incredibly fast.
The neuron pathways remain in your brain once they are created but they grow weak without use. When you come back to a subject, your brain works to scrape the rust off of those pathways.
You’d be amazed at the amount of momentum you gain as you begin studying and strengthening those pathways after years of neglect.
Remember that the more you know, the easier it is to learn the next subject. Your brain can create comparisons and patterns based on your stock knowledge.
Becoming the Good Kind of Intimidating
Knowing how to play chess, poker, and backgammon will make it easier to learn spades or gin rummy. You will recognize crossovers in strategy and learn much faster than someone who doesn’t understand any of those games.
How does this relate to becoming intimidating?
This is one of the reasons why men become more accomplished and successful later in life. For men who have been educating themselves and learning new skills, acquiring new skills becomes easier.
By continuously learning and training your brain, you’ll eventually reach a tipping point when your skills run both diverse and deep.
This is how you become the good kind of intimidating. Your confidence will grow to match your increasing expertise because subconsciously you know that you have been growing and improving for years.
In the process, others will view you as more intelligent than most. This is because MOST people don’t feed their brain, instead they may have one or two skills that they like or simply dabble in.
Meanwhile, you have been improving, slowly and steadily. Years of knowledge-building created new pathways in your brain enabling you to devise strategies and solve countless problems as you sleep. Problems you may not even be conscious of.
This is how your success becomes inevitable. The skills you acquire may not matter much when viewed in isolation, but your combined skill set makes you an intimidating man whom others would envy.
Match your intimidation with kindness and good intentions and you can go further than most average men can only dream of, all because you allow yourself to keep learning and keep making those small improvements in your life.
You start as a single snowflake and grow into an unstoppable avalanche. It is up to you to start rolling down the mountain and begin building momentum.