As guys, we get our initial attraction to women from their physical appearance. It’s how we are wired. But what happens when you realize that you’re now dating someone with no personality?
You may have been in this situation before. It starts off as exciting, fresh, and fun when you go out on the first few dates with a woman. You start to feel out each other’s personalities and quirks. Maybe you begin meeting each other’s friends for the first time. But after dating her for several weeks, you start to realize that she has no real interests outside of school or work and she doesn’t even have her own opinions. She is totally boring.
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So you’re dating a boring girl
Okay, so you’ve been dating a little while and now you realize that she has no interests, hobbies, or passions. It may sound mean but you’ve got yourself a pretty boring girlfriend. It’s not necessarily a bad thing though. There could be good reasons that she hasn’t found any interests yet.
You can either decide to end the relationship or you can stick with her and see if she is only temporarily boring. It is up to you either way but you should consider that there may be a good reason why she is the way she is at the moment.
Reasons she doesn’t have any interests
There are some legitimate reasons why she hasn’t discovered her interests yet so don’t write her off before considering her circumstances. After all, you might be able to help her find herself. Here are some of the more likely reasons that she may not have any interests.
This is the most common reason why women haven’t found their passion yet. She has probably followed popular trends but nothing has clicked for her yet. As long as she keeps looking and trying new hobbies, she will find something that catches her interest.
She will have time to figure out what she enjoys. Try not to put pressure on her or have a ton of expectations. If you’re patient with your potential partner, you will eventually find out what she is interested in and maybe you will even share the same interests with her.
She hasn’t had the time to discover herself yet
Some people go directly from high school straight into college and keep such a hectic schedule that they don’t have time to figure out what they really like. This part of their life gets delayed and they can come off as boring to most people. Eventually, when she has time to examine her life, she will have a chance to discover her interests and better enjoy life.
It will be a big change once she has time to decompress from the busy life of constant studying and deadlines. You have a chance to introduce her to some new ideas that might click with her. And is possible that you will even have similar personalities once she has a chance to figure out what excited her in life.
She’s had a rough life
Sometimes people just get dealt a bad hand. Maybe she had to take care of her ill parents at an early age and wasn’t able to experience the world as other kids did. She might be shy, introverted, or insecure about herself too. Whatever happened in her past will have an impact on who she is now. If all her time has been spent on surviving, she hasn’t had a fair chance to relax and find her passions.
If you are dating a girl like this, be patient with her behavior and realize that hobbies and other interests take time to develop. Sure, it’s frustrating that she may be a little unexciting right now but she may just need someone spending time with her and help her discover herself.
Dating someone who is hard to read
There is a big difference between dating people with no personality and dating someone who you have a hard time understanding. Some girls are just more difficult to read. They don’t wear their emotions on their sleeves and can sometimes seem distant.
If you’re dating a girl like this, it might be that she is just an introverted person or someone who has been hurt in the past and doesn’t want to open up too quickly. She may have a great personality but it doesn’t help unless you can get her to reveal it.
You may not think that you have anything in common with her but give it some time, she may eventually open up and let you see what she is really like. Ask her about it but don’t be pushy. If you push too hard, she’ll just close off even more or possibly try to push you away. You can’t force an introvert to open up. They have to decide on their own as you gain their trust.
Do your best to be supportive and understanding. Once she starts feeling comfortable being herself around you, she will stop hiding and you can advance the conversations beyond small talk. This will take a different amount of time, based on a ton of factors. In reality, there is no way to predict how much time it will take for her to stop holding back and come out of her comfort zone.
Be patient, just be yourself and see if she eventually opens up about what’s on her mind. If not, you’re probably better off moving on but don’t write her off as a romantic partner without giving her the benefit of the doubt first.
There are some people with no personality at all
There are actually people out there who have no hobbies or interests. They don’t have any passions at all. This can happen with overconsumption of media. They may be addicted to video games, television shows, or watching movies. Of course, there is nothing wrong with watching TV and playing video games but if they spend pretty much all their time doing it, they will lose touch with the real world and find it hard to socialize.
If their entire life is based around the consumption of TV shows and watching movies, they may not be able to relate with you on any other level. If this is the case, it might be impossible to connect with them on any meaningful level.
This is not to say that you should automatically break up with someone like this but if they are a hollow shell of a human being, there is no real reason to date them. They are basically just staring into space all day and you will eventually get bored if you try to form a meaningful and healthy relationship with her. Her lack of self-worth and social skills make a relationship almost impossible.
Dating outside your type
Another possibility is that as you find out her interests, they are totally different than what you are interested in. You may be dating someone who looks like your type but in reality, they are just a completely different type of person. This doesn’t have to be a deal-breaker but would be smart to search for some kind of common interest if you want to form a stable relationship that will last for the long term.
Differences are great but there should be some amount of commonality in order to make a romantic relationship stick. In most cases, this isn’t really dating someone with no personality but simply dating outside your type.
Dating someone you don’t like
Sometimes you’ll be dating a girl and realize that you don’t like her. Whether it is a dark personality trait or her actions that bother you doesn’t matter. When you realize that you don’t like her, cut your losses and move on. There is no point in wasting time dating someone who doesn’t make you happy or who annoys you.
Guys often ignore warning signs and try to date the girl anyway. They ignore the red flags and hope that she will change for them. If you’re dating someone who doesn’t treat you well or makes you feel bad about yourself, cut your losses and move on to someone else. The signs you shouldn’t date her are flashing in your face so be smart and end the relationship before it gets even worse.
It is far better to be single rather than try to fix a relationship that is doomed from the start. You will find someone again so why try to be with someone who is obviously a bad fit for you? You can’t force a successful relationship to happen if you two are incompatible. Keep looking and eventually, you may find a happy long-term relationship with someone you are highly compatible with.